Weighing heavily on my mind...

Shortly after getting up this morning, we received the phone call that we were expecting for the last couple of weeks. An extended family member and close family friend, Cheryl, passed away this morning. Cheryl has been fighting a very courageous battle with cancer for nearly 2 years now. After realizing a few weeks ago that the chemotherapy would no longer work, she was able to move home and receive in-home hospice care and spend her last days with her family.

All day long I have had a heavy heart. The sun was shining, and it was just the perfect fall day. Part of me feels like it should be raining on a sad day such as this, yet knowing that Cheryl is now in heaven, with her mom again after 12 years of separation, I know that it truly is a joyful day for her. She was such a religious person that today was finally her reward, as she gets to meet her God. However for her family it is just the beginning of a long road without her present and they will now have to wait to see her again when they rejoice together in heaven.

I tried really hard to soak in all the moments of my day. They are so stressful and so busy sometimes, and I have so many moments of just plain overwhelming feelings of "Will my life EVER be calm again?" Then I tell myself, "YES! They are only this little once and life will slow down and get just a little bit easier"...yet it's something I have to tell myself over and over again, day after day. I don't want to take one second of my life for granted, yet it seems like I struggle with just wanting it to be naptime, or bedtime, so I can just have a few minutes to myself. I know this is normal, but I can't help feeling guilty having these feelings. I know that Cheryl would have done anything (and she tried!) to have even one more minute with her children and grandchildren. She didn't want to go yet; she wasn't ready to say goodbye to her life.

It's just so unfair...
yet those that truly believe in God and heaven know that dying is the true gift. It's just so hard for us here on earth, those of us left to say goodbye and stay "behind", to understand and believe.

A visit to Canada

Over Labor Day weekend, Gage and I took a "Mommy and Me" trip up north to Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada, to visit our dear friends, the Dube's. Yvonne and I met in a "Baby and Me" class through ECFE in when Gage was about 10 weeks old, and Gabrielle was about 6 weeks. Even after our move to Wisconsin, Yvonne and I kept in close touch and got together at least once or twice a month for visits and playdates. Gage and Gabi grew up together, and both are missing one another since the Dube's moved back to their home country of Canada last fall, 2009.

Ever since Gabi moved, Gage will ask at least once a week, "Mom, can we go to Canava to visit Gabi?" No matter how many times I've told him to say Cana-DA, he still pronounces it will a "V". I finally decided that we could make it work, and we left the twins home with Daddy and took a 4 day trip over Labor Day weekend.

We had a BLAST. It was so easy to be free of the twins (is that bad of me to say?) and just enjoy being a mom of one again. I had forgotten how easy it is to travel with just one child, which included one small carry-on bag, no stroller, no bottles or diapers, and just hand-holding to where we needed to go.

We spent most of the time at Brian and Yvonne's house, as there are plenty of toys and fun to be had by all. Gage especially liked the trampoline out back, and the kids were usually out there jumping in their pajama's at the crack of dawn. We took the kids to a wonderful kid amusement park, "Tinker Town" one day where the kids were able to go on rides all day long. Brian was also kind enough to allow Yvonne and I not one, but TWO times out...just the two of us, to shop and go out to eat. THAT was heaven within itself!

Since our return, Gage has asked me every couple of days when we can go back to visit Gabi again. Kind of breaks my heart, as I don't know when our next visit will be, but I hope within the next year that they can either get to WI for a visit, or we can get there...

But until next time, we have the photos, and more importantly the memories, of our wonderful visit, with wonderful friends.

Yeah. Um. The kids were gone "playing" quietly for awhile, and since we had just gotten there a little while before, Yvonne and I were deep in conversation and didn't know how long the quiet play had been going on. Thank goodness for washable markers, eh?

Another side note: These are Gabi's underwear. When the kids were jumping on the trampoline earlier, it was wet on the grass due to Winnipeg getting so much rain. Gage's pants and underwear were soaked, so Yvonne just gave him some of Gabi's!

Lil' Sophie. She's such a hoot. That is dirt on her face, and why I took the picture!

Making hot cocoa for breakfast!

The kids found a cool frog on our way home from the park. They named it Mr. Hopper Toad! I thought that was a cool name. They kept it in the fishbowl for a few days and then I made them put it back in the grass so it wouldn't die. I'm such a softie.

All of us on the Tilt-a-Whirl. Yvonne and I were both very ill for a good half hour after this ride. Very nauseated and fighting bad headaches. We realized we are getting older...

Little Miss Sophie

Brian and Yvonne

MS Mud Run 2010

That's ME!

This past weekend, I completed one of the craziest, messiest, and most challenging 10k (6.2 miles) of my entire life thus far.
The Multiple Sclerosis Society held the Twin Cities first annual MUD RUN in Dresser, WI. This is an event that has been taking place all over the US recently, but seems to be becoming a bigger deal as each event takes place. Well over 1000 runners participated in the course, which was held at the Trollhaugen Ski Resort.
Ski resort? Yes. Hills. Lots and lots of hills.

The race started out with a run through 2 huge mud pits, about thigh-high. We went from being "chilly" in the upper 50's weather, to be soaked with cold, wet, muddy water.
We then ran up a very large hill, down an even bigger one, up and over 3 sandhills, and up yet another large hill. Then, into the woods we went!

The course contained about 79 obstacles, most of which were muddy water pits ranging from ankle deep to chest deep water. There were logs to crawl over, swim under (in the mud), sand hills to climb, and the list goes on and on.

The larger obstacles were the ones that I take most pride in. I completed every.single.one. And the only one I needed assistance on was the 6 ft log wall. I needed a "butt boost", but once shoved, I was able to get myself up and over. There was a large climbing ladder (about 20 ft high?) that I successfully climbed up and over, a similar sized cargo net (not stretched tight on the bottom...it was loose!) that was probably my biggest accomplishment and one I am most proud of. I took off with a team of 16, but finished with my friend Lisa, and my friend Diana was not far behind. I feel bad leaving her, it is still weighing on me, but she promises me I am not too horrible of a friend.

I finished the course in 2 hours 27 minutes, and am damn proud of myself. I also raised $620 for MS Research, and my team came in 4th place in fundraising efforts out of over 300 teams! THAT is an accomplishment in itself.

Will I do this again next year???

HELL YA!

Will you join me???

Team "Filthy Fliers" before the race~ Clean and cold!

The cargo net. My biggest accomplishment!

Lisa and I just after the mudslide and nearing the finish line!

Sooooo DONE!

Monte Carlo

Tim and I went to Monte Carlo, Monaco in late July/Early August.
Tim earned the trip for work, and it was a wonderful time. As I am so far behind on posting on this damn blog (and I'm sure you have all noticed!! Jacque? Rachel? Mom? Katie?) I'm not going to say much...just add pictures.
Ya'll don't want to read what I have to say anyhow...pictures are much more exciting!

Gage-Growing up!

Gage's 1st day of 4-year-old pre-school came and went like any other day. Gage is in the same school that he went to last year for 3-yr-old preschool, and he also went for 6 weeks this summer in a summer school program they offered. Many of the same kids are in his class again this year, so it just didn't seem to phase him that he was going for 4 days a week this year, rather than 2.

Being a July birthday, we still aren't sure what we are going to do next year. We may have him repeat the 4-yr-old preschool class again, so that he is older than the majority of his classmates, rather than the very youngest. We'll see. Either way, he is doing well in school and enjoys being with his friends.

Landon

My Landon. He's my ham. And my busy boy.
Gets into EVERYTHING.
He's fast.
He's a stinker, and he knows it.
Sometimes, he'll just sit by the door of our bedroom or an open bathroom and wait for you to come looking for him, and when we find him...
he crawls as fast as he can, giggling all the way.
He has a temper.
He is difficult to change, so I have to use my leg to hold him down sometimes!
Love his laugh. And his smile.

Bronson

My Bronson. Tends to be a bit quieter than his brother, but he does have a temper. Especially when he is trying to do something (pull himself up) and he can't quite get it.
Loves to Cuddle.
Loves his nuk.
Loves to make silly faces, especially when the person behind the camera says, "Cheeeeeese".
He loves to just sit and look at books; doesn't crawl yet, but does a very quick "butt-scoot" that is drawing attention everywhere we go...